The Revenge of the Gift
by rip-through-my-nameless-seams
Summary: The green gift has graced Kisame again, and he seems to want to share today. And look, Zetsu has decided to hit it this time. Rated for DRUG REFERENCES!


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The Revenge of the Gift

Author's Note: The magicaly amazing writing powers of the Soned Fish have decided to grant you with a second story! oh...and if you haven't had the graciousness to read OR review the first of the stoner masterpieces, then the stoned fish and myself will chase you around with a bit of wood until you comply...and if you don't...die in a hole...

One faithful night, 'bout six months ago, I bought my destiny in the form of a dime from some guy in an alley. That dime sealed my fate. If you haven't read that story, go die in a hole.

But this time…it was better. It happened last night at like, 11, when I took Zet-chan off of his shelf in my closet. (Not a very original place to hide a 4 foot bong, but my amazing tall-ness makes it so only I could reach him.) It had been 3 agonizing days since I had used him last, but tonight was different. I motored my way down the hall, my giant bong in tow. It was silent, the only sounds my shark-like ear-holes could detect, were those of my boots on the hardwood floor, and the sound of a distant TV somewhere in the nether realms of the hotel. I mean "headquarters". (Lame-o, cheap-ass leader)

I crept, and when I say crept, I mean kinda stumbled and flip kicked, my way into the common room, where sat Itachi, Sasori, Dede, Pein, the actual Zet, and Conan. They were all watchin TV (cept Zet, he was reading a book) [Nerd, but when I slammed my friend onto the table, things changed.

Itachi's face looked bemused, little Dede gasped in fear and jumped on Sasori's lap, and Zet plucked a long, green hair, put it in his book, and shut it with a snap. Conan and Pein looked frightened, and left the room. Zet was the first to say anything.

"'Ame, you seem to be missing your bowl-piece."

That one threw me off the proverbial rocker. Zetsu, a stoner?!? Hmmm…. It made sense.

I took the loaded bowl out of my cloak, and ritualistically placed it in the stem.

"GREENS!!!!!" Dede screamed.

Zet looked down on the bowl, a single tear slid from his yellow eye.

"'Ame, it's beautiful."

The rotation had been established.

It was on.

Dede snatched the bong from the table with lightning speed. He took a respectably large hit for someone so small. The pungent smoke oozed from the collar of his cloak. Fuckin chest-mouthed weirdo.

I was next. I ripped my little friend so hard, I thought my lungs would collapse. Giant clouds of smoke roiled out from my gills. It was so tasty.

Zetsu was next. He started out slow. Then he lit it and cherried the whole of the fist sized bowl. It was the most massive hit I had ever witnessed. It went on almost a whole minute. There was so much THC in that hit it could have toppled a whale!(or a shark for that matter) after he was finished, he didn't let any smoke out, it must have went into photosynthesis, or something that sounds planty. His fly-trap thingy closed, leaving only a sliver of his face for the world to see.

Next, it was Itachi. He took a decent sized ripper, not his best, but respectable none-the-less.

This is when shit got weird. Sasori took his hit. It was massive, but the seasoned stoners of the room knew he had bitten off more than he could chew. He started to wheeze, then to cough, then he was finished. He sighed then leaned over and bit a huge chunk out o Dede's shoulder. Dede cursed super loud in some foreign tongue, picked up the tiny, puppet-man, and stalked off. I've never laughed that hard. An awkward silence followed.

Zet broke it.

"Am I the only one in which an insatiable hunger was invoked by that scene?"

"Actually…no." I replied. Itachi nodded.

And all together we formed one solid thought. Taco Bell sounded really, really awesome. And with stoner speed, we wrote a note to commander, we were off into the night. Three unstoppable, weirdo stoners, lookin for eats.

THE END!

Or is it?

NOTES

Another product of Stoned Fish's Half-Bakery

Props to Ita and Zet for buying my cheap-ass eats

Props to Dede and Sasori for the night's high point

Props to Conan and Pein for letting me use their names

Props to the alley guy (whoever he was) cuz I didn't give him props before

Props to you for reading my tale

Props!!!


End file.
